Reflecting on the gym...of all things

i go to the gym occasionally. i do this not to maintain a self image of a sexy beast waxing his guns in front of the o'er painted females of my generation, though that wouldnt suck too much to be so self-assured. no, i do it because my work demands i be physically neutral, leaning on the side of fit so i can adjust my body as needed and perform fancy tricks as advertised...and i'm always silently preparing myself for zombies. everyone should. if you're not then go get a cyanide tooth now and save yourself allot of trouble.

my legs hurt and i blame you, the american people for creating this overwhelming expectation to not be a placidly hedonistic tub o crap that i'm so good at being! damn.

i try not to just go to the gym and do one thing the whole time. it would not only be ass numbingly boring but its also good for the body to have to deal with different exercises so that it never falls into a routine: routine is when the...oh nevermind, who cares about WHY, lets get to the wherefore. so i'm doing blah blah for this reason or that and i look over and see a pile of meat and manicured hair that i suppose passes for a normal person underneath his almost comical layer of bulky muscle mass. he's got his armband MP3 player and his t-shirt slit down to the waist so it shows off his wicked tight lats (latissimus dorsi, you jersy fuck), and gelled hair. he's flexing in the mirror as often as he's picking things up to put them down again and i see that, for all his stereotypical douche-ness he is in GREAT shape, and i wonder "god, is that how i should be doing that?"
i'm running about a big ovular or maybe oblong track, surrounded by the hopefully out of shape who are too intimidated by free weights or treadmills so they'll just walk in circles (oblongs?) until they're sweaty, discouraged, both, or they feel "the burn" that will inspire them to come back tommorow or next day to do it all again, but FASTER. whatever, i'm not alone and i'm somewhere between the embarassingly fit and the plain embarassed and i see a pretty girl jump onto the track. she's pretty like a dandelion is pretty: there are many like her and in no time at all it will all blow away under the lips of a malicious boy, but for now, she is lovely. she sits back into her center of gravity and easily lopes out a pace that makes me quietly join the ranks of the embarassed. she's pacing herself at a pace i have to huff and puff at just to fall behind. she makes it look easy, but its a way of running i've never seen before and i wonder "god, is that how i should be doing that?"
the climbing wall is where the nerds go to be sexy. low impact, non competitive, and favorable to those with as little erroneous body mass as possible: its a sport designed with the malnourished emo/punks of our generation specifically in mind. as quick as it takes me to fall off a v2 trail (2 out of five, thanks) some lanky bastid will damn near spider-man his way past me, pausing to take off his shirt, chalk his hands and flex...lean muscled no-body fat little prats. bu i watch them and they can hold half their body weight on the tips of their fingers like some overdressed african baboons (though baboons can hold their ENTIRE body weight with just two fingers. wow, right?) and they swing their legs in unison to the moving of their arms scuttling across the wall, making it look like someone filmed a crab on an uneven floor design and then turned the projector on its side to make it look like a magic wall crab. i watch them tirelessly and effortlessly traverse 20 horizontally on as much surface area as could be covered by half the burger i ate before i came here and i think "god, is that how i should be doing that?"
i'm leaving now and as i pass the line to get in and join the line to get out i see couples quietly co-existing, not hating each other but visibly devoid of love. i see that couple fighting over nothing, and i see this couple of beautiful young people, both so self absorbed with their muscles or bust display that they forget the reason they're here TOGETHER...you know where i'm going. i can look at these people, focused into themselves and their image that they forget each other, and in that realization i can say "thank god i know i shouldnt be doing THAT"

i'm feeling lovely today, i just heard that line "god, is that how i should be doing that?" as i was working out and in my head i saw how i wanted to use it...hope it meant what i wanted. how is everyone? (everyone, i think, includes erika and steph, cause i think you two are the only people who read this thing other than me. thanks by the way :))